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Something to piss off you liberals

May 31, 01:23 AM · from the mouth of Bryan I thought the snazzy title would get you reading further since apparently I’m the stupid one in the group. Since we all give our little nudges here and there with politics (and since I’m outnumbered – and John), Here is a cut and pasted copy of an article written by a Democrat that I thought I would share with my fellow goofy liberals/guys. Finally a realisitc view from a Democrat. Now there’s something you don’t hear everyday.

10 reasons not to kill Bush

By Jennifer McBride

Oregon Daily Emerald (U. Oregon)

(U-WIRE) EUGENE, Ore.—Recently in Georgia, the president gave a speech only to have someone chuck a hand grenade at him. Lucky for all, the blast cap did not explode. Though originally thought to be a dud, the FBI later revealed the weapon was far from safe.

I can’t possibly guess the assassin’s reasoning, but I’ve heard enough people on campus proclaiming their hatred of George W. Bush to know that some wouldn’t have shed many tears. And that’s a shame.

If the assassin were looking for a way to hurt America, blowing up the president would be a good idea. Bush’s martyrdom would put the last nail in the coffin of the liberal agenda. So, for those Bush-haters out there, here are 10 reasons you should stop praying for an assassinated G.W.B.:

1) Killing the president immediately generates sympathy for his cause. If the president died tomorrow, there would be no question that all of his nominees for the judicial branch would make it through the Senate.

2) A dead President Bush leaves a live Dick Cheney in charge. Need I say more?

3) The Pakistani political situation is drastically fragile. Should President Bush die, Musharraf’s brutal, mostly secular dictatorship probably will be replaced by a brutal, religiously fundamental dictatorship, reducing the United States’ chances of bringing in Osama bin Laden to nil.

4) Any criticisms of the administration will be regarded as more unpatriotic than ever. In the next election, you could expect to see Democratic primary candidates proclaiming that their Republican counterparts aren’t “fit to follow in President Bush’s footsteps.”

5) Killing President Bush could spur another spate of international invasions, with or without U.N. approval. The U.S. military cannot deal with invading another country without further hollowing our ability to defend ourselves and respond to threats from other countries, such as a nuclear North Korea.

6) The news cycle would be justly co-opted. With the media so focused on one story, there wouldn’t be time to examine important issues such as the government suppression in Uzbekistan or Egyptian election tampering. In fact, all foreign news that didn’t directly affect the assassination would probably grind to a halt.

7) President Bush’s status as a martyr would leave the electorate more polarized than ever, especially if liberals were seen as publicly irreverent to President Bush’s memory. It would be a little different if natural selection decreed death-by-snacking, but toasting an assassin’s success leaves a decidedly bitter taste in the national mouth.

8) Jeb Bush’s popularity would skyrocket. He would undoubtedly win the Republican nomination and then the election in 2008. With the Supreme Court full of near-zombies, I would prefer a different man to pick the people who are going to strangle us with laws.

9) Killing George Bush won’t end any of the policies people disagree with. An assassination would merely strengthen our resolve to stay the course in Iraq, keep troops in Saudi Arabia, support our Israeli allies, etc. Policies don’t die just because the president does.

10) Slaying President Bush is simply immoral. Anyone who advocates purposefully killing someone defenseless (and a democratically elected leader, no less) is clearly value-challenged. I don’t understand the logical contortions some people must go through to be anti-death penalty yet pro-assassination.

In all seriousness, I don’t hate President Bush. I dislike a lot of his administration’s choices, but I think he’s a good man doing a difficult job. As a leader, you’re always going to be hated. I am too often shocked by the vitriolic repulsion many people feel for our leader and America in general, especially because the loathing is often poorly informed. I’ve met people on this campus who see America as the worst human rights abuser in the world (unlike the angelic paradise of Cambodia) and people who sway liberal not because they actually know anything about issues but because it’s popular.

Liberalism has to be more than a college fad or a collection of loudmouths whose idiotic comments stir headlines. The rabid dislike some people feel for a man they’ve never even met makes me ashamed to be a Democrat.


Comment [17]

  1. jake responds with:

    Although many of those talking points could be argued as flawed I have to agree with the general message. As much as I find Bush’s ego to be annoying and foolhardy. I also realize that he’s more of a figurehead. The real evil is all the people behind him pushing their own agendas. If he were to die, nothing would drastically change in the way our country is run.

    I’d still be called unpatriotic for disagreeing with the powers that be. Which is about as patriotic as you can be when you consider out forefathers. Hell, a good chunk of the red states boast with Confederate flags. If that’s not unpatriotic I don’t know what is.
    · May 31, 12:01 PM
  2. Andy responds with:

    This columnist is basically right. I would never want Bush to be assassinated for all of those reasons. Many of them I’d never thought of, but I long ago realized that Dick Cheney would be president if Bush were to die. That alone is reason enough for me to be anti-assassination. Cheney is corporate greed and smarminess personified, Bush is just another ideologue.

    The only thing that ever makes me “ashamed to be a Democrat” is our lack of cohesion and of balls. I can’t believe we put all our hopes and dreams in John Kerry. My parents’ cat would have had a better shot against Bush. And now we’re pandering to the right. There’s no reason to do that: Bush won the election fair and square, but not by much. There is still a substantial minority of the country that doesn’t like his policies, a majority on some issues! I just hope that the leading Democrats can stand up for our beliefs instead of allowing the party to drift to the right.

    And Bryan, notice I’m not bashing Republicans as a whole at all. You seem to have caught Anne Coulter syndrome: if you don’t like one apple, then all apples must be bad, so it’s OK to talk trash about them. And Anne Coulter has done this about Democrats and liberals. I can’t stand when I log onto IM and I read yet another of her quotes in your away message saying how liberals are tree-huggers or something like that. Her words are hurtful, and your adoption of them suggests to me that you’ve forgotten the liberals who are dear in your life (e.g. US!). I know I can’t make generalizations like that about Republicans knowing people like you and my dad and my friend Vijay.

    OK that wasn’t supposed to be a diatribe. It’s not all that serious. Anne Coulter is just a ridiculous ho.
    · May 31, 01:42 PM
  3. Tyler responds with:


    The title of your posting is “Something to piss off you liberals”. Did you really think this would piss me off? Did you honestly think I want the President dead?! I agree with everything this girl writes and I applaud her for it.

    First of all, I’m not a violent person and don’t believe an assasination could ever solve anything.

    Next, I don’t wish any pain or sufffering to the president. He is a good man. I just disgree with a lot of what he does and says. I don’t wish suffering to you just because we disagree about politics. You’re among my best friends, you’re a good person, and I want nothing but the best for you. Same principle applies to George Bush (except for the best friend part!).

    Also in your intro you said “Finally a realisitc view from a Democrat.” I think you’d be suprized to learn that people who WOULD want the president assasinated are in a minisclue minority. It’s the idiots who think that killing George Bush or throwing a pie at Anne Coulter is a good way to send a message that give us a bad name. Most democrats are sensible, peaceful, intelligent, reflective people. You make them out to be a group of maniacs.

    Also, to add to Andy’s comment on Anne Coulter, she’s a strong, intelligent woman who knows a LOT about politics. But she’s also someone who makes a living by being a bully. And I don’t like bullies. You could say the same about Michael Moore, and while I agree with some of what he stands for, I don’t like when he acts like a bully.

    I don’t like bullies.

    Also, what do you mean “apparently I’m the stupid one in the group”? I hope you don’t feel that way, because I sure don’t. Be nicer to yourself. Love yourself! This is my inner tree-hugger coming out now.

    Just don’t love yourself too much, or you’ll grow hair on your palms!
    · May 31, 02:57 PM
  4. Andy responds with:

    I share Tyty’s distaste for Michael Moore. Yeah I used to go to his website a lot. But I just can’t do it anymore. He’s just as bad as Fox news, just on the other side – spinning every news tidbit his way to make it sound horrifying and sensational. And I’m not just talking about the Fox News network, which does have its moments of clarity, but even my own local Fox 5 which airs news promos like “Find out tonight why your towel could KILL you!” What programs like that do for fearful Americans of all persuasions, Michael Moore does for scared liberals.

    And there’s one thing I forgot to mention that bothered about Bry’s original posting. The columnist uses the word “martyr” to describe what Bush would become if he was assassinated. I can’t help but draw a parallel between that and our Islamist Terrorist friends (enemies) who place high value on martyrs that blow themselves up. I know the correlation isn’t exact, but I think the columnist is right. And that fact disturbs me, because it means that there is a strain of fundamentalism in America as well which, though not militant of itself, seems to be growing in influence at the expense of our (my?) secular values. Personally, even if I liked Bush I wouldn’t want to call him a martyr because of that fundamentalist undertone. Maybe something more like a casualty. Do people think of Kennedy as a martyr? Really, I don’t know – forgive me if I continue to wax philosophical over stupid semantics.
    · May 31, 03:57 PM
  5. jake responds with:

    Ya know how I usually stay out of arguments revolving around this subject? I’m an independent. The whole two primary party system sickens me. As do the debates on TV that exclude you if you’re not Ross Perot, e.g. a billionaire. The debates should be based on percentages, something like, if you can somehow get say 15% of the nation interested, you should be able to participate.

    Stating my insanity… I mean independence does remind me of a short anecdote. I’m not sure how but I was put on a list as a registered Republican. During the last election I calls from a Republican group a couple times. When I finally picked up the phone and explained I’m an independent they hung up on me. No, “sorry for our mistake sir,” they just hung up on me without a word.

    Which just goes to prove that bitching about each other gets us no where. I wasn’t even given common courtesy by that individual. I would have at least said something to him if I screwed up.
    · May 31, 04:23 PM
  6. Ralph responds with:

    My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
    · May 31, 06:28 PM
  7. Jim responds with:

    But seriously… I wish I could sound all edumacated on political arguments.

    Admittedly, I’ve joked along the lines of Bush assassination, but I too have realized that it wouldn’t matter; the administration behind him is the largest cause of my extreme distress towards our current policies and I agree with the tree hugger – blowing people and things up isn’t a terribly wonderful answer to a problem. (Ahhemmm… much of the reason I strongly disagree with our current administration.)

    I too feel that it is sad that we all have to feel like there’s this horrific division where the people on “the other side” are fanatical “bastards”, etc. Granted, as a whole, I find myself rejecting much of the Republican agenda, but at that, I’m not overly enthralled by much of the Democratic agenda either. I think that people focus too much energy on the partisan division and not enough time on what a politician stands for. I’ll happily vote for a Republican or alternate party official if I feel that they will uphold policies that I agree with.

    This brings me up to one of my biggest complaints about Bush: he tries with all his might to deny people that disagree with him the chance to confront him. When Bushypoo came through the Denver area on his election campaign, I really wanted to go see him speak. This was not so that I could heckle him or spit hatred or rally against him; it was simply because I wanted to hear what he had to say in person so that I could truly judge his statements. Unfortunately though, anyone that was not a registered Republican was barred from his rallies. Pardon my very strong opinion on this matter, but that’s complete and utter bullshit. Unfortunately, no matter how open minded I try to be about Bush, that keeps coming back to haunt me.

    But blah – either way, I love all you guys, regardless of whether you are a Republican, Democrat, Centerist, Communist, Catholic, Satist, Pagan or whatever. If we all agreed on everything all the time, how would we ever have a good, healthy argument? And without a good healthy argument, how can one have make-up sex?
    · May 31, 06:50 PM
  8. Tyler responds with:

    Here here.
    · May 31, 07:19 PM
  9. Andy responds with:

    Going back to what Jake said for a sec (and Jimmy too).

    I agree that 2-party politics sucks. Example from my own life: in 2000, I really liked John McCain for president. In fact, I might have voted for him over Gore (another non-candidate) in a head to head election. But, because Republican primaries in most states are open ONLY to Republicans, I had no say in the matter. And I know for sure I wasn’t in alone in my feelings.

    I don’t know a whole lot about it, but I’m pretty sure that many other countries function on multi-party systems. In fact I’m sure that the new Iraq is built that way. That is, a single party rarely is in the majority, but has to compromise and form a coalition with another party in order push its agenda through. So instead of constantly bashing back and forth, each party has to compromise with the knowledge that it could, in the future, be seeking a coalition with anyone! Or at least I think that’s how it works…

    Anyhoo I would much prefer something like that to our current system of obstinate bickering, even though I do feel compelled to take a side in the current system. In fact, we should start our own party. We could advocate for legalizing pot and having casual anal sex with your friends (with full body condoms, of course), as well as fixing No Child Left Behind. And we could form a department of sexuality, dedicated to the advancement of the average American couple’s sexual happiness and knowledge. And we could make one of you single guys the lead hetero (and hot lesbian) field researcher. And we could promise jobs in our new department to graduating college kids. We’d win the youth vote in a snap!

    Or we could just advocate for jobs and the environment and education. Those seem to work for every party because they’re so vague.
    · May 31, 07:48 PM
  10. Tyler responds with:

    Quick, ‘cause I gotta go home now, and sorta unrelated, but Andy’s “Department of Sexuality” made me think about all the gay marraige stuff that was all in the news a few months ago (and still is, but dwindling…).

    If we’re so concerned with protecting the sanctity of marriage, perhaps we should focus our efforts on lowering the divorce rate. What d’ya think about that?
    · May 31, 08:01 PM
  11. Bryan responds with:

    Holy responses batman! I didn’t want to piss any liberals off, I just thought you would actually read a post of mine if I put that for a title, and apparantely it worked :) Andy, you can’t take what Ann says “literaly” she’s poking fun. If you take her quotes literaly, then you are no better then the people that swear that the bible is the “only truth” and those people piss me off just as much as anyone else, and I’m a catholic. Your father is a republican Andy? I’m feeling the love/hate. This is good! To counter what Ty said in the end about lowering divorce rates, Bush had an idea about that within the new budget proposal. Lowering divorce rates is good for the economy (I know I’m jumping around) Oh and Ty, I’m not making Democrats out to be mainiacs, I just can’t stand that they are attacking the right so much. The democrats seem to either be more pissed off at the fact that either the republicans are coming up with all the “good” ideas (I.E. private accounts – don’t get me started on that one) or that they just aren’t coming up with any good ideas. (jump) Oh, and I’m so glad you guys are getting a miss taste for Michael Moore :) Look, I just think Ann is funny. There are pleanty of Liberals (Bill Maher) that say great jokes about republicans. In fact I bet you could name at least 10 “Liberal” public figures that talk the same way Ann does. So how come in a 1 to 10 ratio the “open minded” liberals are offended by the other opinion once a “right winger” speaks out. (Ann goes over that in her book too) (jump) watch the Fox hits too. I personally feel that they do not give one side. Yes, they do tend to be more twords the right, but I feel that they are “fair” but I do not feel that they are “balanced” (jump) Jim, I like the fact that you wanted to see him and not throw a pie at him. I’ve read an article on that about “only registered republicans” it was a major security issue from what I remember in the article. Hey, I think he sucks at a public speaker personally (jump) make up sex is great, especially with Octopussy (jump) Yes, 2 party politics definately suck ass (jump) I voted for Gore the first term (jump) I do agree about No Child Left Behind; good idea, but needs MAJOR reconstructing. Im glad to see such a strong response guys. I figured a subject like this was well worth talking about as appossed to the recent void of burp and computer talk. I feel touched right in my colon from you guys, and I love you all. P.S. everyone email me (except Ty) we have to start planning his bachelor party!! Oh and how are the workouts going Jim and Ty?
    · May 31, 10:20 PM
  12. Tyler responds with:

    Ha! Workouts? What workouts?
    · Jun 1, 11:13 AM
  13. Jim responds with:

    * burp *

    Good good my fine fury friends. Been going to the gym at least 2 times a week (shooting for four.) I chopped 15lbs and seem to be holding there, but I’m still making progress since my waist line is ever so slowly shrinking.

    Bry, are you back in the gym ever since you had your little winky removed? :)
    · Jun 1, 12:46 PM
  14. Bryan responds with:

    Oh yeah. Hard core diet too Jim. Tuna out of a can (seasoned with black pepper and sazon) every other day, Heavy loads of fruits and veggies to keep the hunger down. Very little bread. I’m shooting for 4 too, now I’m at the same about 2 to 3 times a week.
    · Jun 1, 08:27 PM
  15. Tyler responds with:

    I’m a bad boy. No workouts. Still dieting. Still losing slowly. I’m down 25 lbs. But still have a gut. Bad TyTy! Bad!

    P.S. What’s sazon?
    · Jun 2, 11:06 AM
  16. Bryan responds with:

    Hey 26 lbs is good too bro. Just do some crunches in the morning before work. That’ll wake you up too. Now when you say “dieting” what do you mean?
    · Jun 2, 11:08 AM
  17. Tyler responds with:

    Sorta my own version of South Beach. I cut out all sugar and most refined and processed carbs.

    I hate crunches, but at least they’re easy and I can do ‘em at home. I wanna get back into a yoga routine too. I actually have a great abs yoga video. I should do that. Yeah. Word.
    · Jun 2, 05:05 PM
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